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Penis too big? Click here or maybe not !
Penis too big? Click here or maybe not ! Members only site,that is if you don't miss off some brainless twat. By Linda Harrison 7 Feb 2001 at 22:57 SHARE ▼ Yes,the one from those Planet of the Apes movies. Nova,like big,but cock.! Just when you thought every subject had been covered on the Web, behold, a site for men whose penises are too big.Or perhaps too small.There have been members complaining their Peter's are just say too small.Really.I can see men complaining that their ducks are too big,but small...fuck yourself. Yes, it is possible to be too well hung, and the Large Penis Support Group at lpsg.org goes all out to prove the difficulties involved for these poor afflicted souls.Yes,now short cocked morons. Don't laugh Did you know that around 1.5 per cent of all accidents in the home are caused by large penis-related incidents? "Although only a small number have been known to be fatal", the site states.Guys sticking their dicks in lamb sockets,vacuum hoses,key holes,microwave ovens,R2D2's mouth,Crazy Nancy's anything,Madame Zoras mouth,George Michaels ass,while he sings Last Christmas,I have my heart. Doctor Jonathan Holmes Sports are also a problem, as this often involves "slapping, twisting, bending, or wrapping of the penis around the groin and thigh area".The Philadelphia eagles lost for years because everyone was tripping over a big dick.The Philadelphia flyers lost for years because everyone was tripping over a big dick.The Philadelphia Phillies lost for years because everyone was tripping over a big dick.The Philadelphia Tiddlewinkers lost for years because everyone was tripping over a big dick. Many guys with big cocks,do not become porn stars.That is a myth.Every moron assumes that a well hung man automatically become a porn star and the rest of us don't.Not every big ducked male joins the club.Get over your delusions.Some men suffer in silence,while dumb bitches like Madame Zora and Tiny Princess,among many others go trolling about the internet under 50 different names,making well hung men lives miserably hard.Sorry,it isn't just the Russian and Chinese.It is possible people that are home grown fucking up the net. Why ? Because they are evil,nasty people in real life and second or third life on the net gives an annoyingly anonymous power.They can make trouble for hundreds of people and not get their teeth punched in the process.Sometimes they gang up on people.Sometimes it it many and sometimes they are many,that are one.The needs of the many are non outweighed by the one.And message boards monitors call prey to their one in many complaint messages. Meanwhile, there's the small matter of underwear - how does one find a pair of underpants to fit? But small underwear that shows off what a big cock you have.But sweat pants,that show off your bulge.Women and men will secretly look.Count on it. Big Jim and his Camper. There's also a forum for surfers to swap member-related horror stories, and an intriguing list of which celebs apparently qualify for this exclusive club.Donald Trump not being one of them.Their is forums were complaining there is no such thing as an 11 inch penis.Is Jonah Falcon or John Holmes really 13 inches or just ten inches ? Many of the forums are as follows. How many women would prefer a 12-inch penis over a 10-inch one, and vice versa? Good question but not one I've discussed with many people.Maybe because this is all bullshit.I suspect,this person might,since this kind of questions show up at Large Penis Support Group once every so often,in the pages of Penthouse Forum,Yahoo Questions,Twitter,Facebook and everywhere else.If there is that many women dating guys with freakishly huge cocks,well,duh the average penis size must be between 10–12" inch and I just might be living on the distant planet Krypton. I've dated a couple of 10–12" inch penis guys and each was different.Batman,Superman,the Hulk,Galactus,Solomon Grundy.Darth Vader,Doctor Doom. Adam Warlock cared and never hurt me, but it took patience and control on his part. I assume he spent most of his sex life never getting all of him into a woman. We spent several happy months together.He was jacking off his 11 cock all the time,when not fighting power Hungary and Titans.He left to go right his other self,then Thantos.Then died and came back a few times. Bob Banner cared not at all and did everything he could to get it all in there, despite my protestations. He was once.Once what,not sure.He kept transforming into the Hulk,where his 10 inch cock turned into 47 inches hard.Wow.! Holy Shot ! It looks like the Redwoods of Yellowstone national park. Connor McCleod cared and didn't want to hurt me with his 12 inches,but there were times his enthusiasm superseded his caution. We tried but didn't last.He spent too much time chopping off Immortal beings heads.No,not that head.The real one.The between their shoulders,most internet trolls never use. (On the other hand, Mike had the smallest penis I'd ever seen on an adult man, both in length and girth. Seriously, a pinkie finger could be bigger. His attitude would have befitted a guy with a 10", he was so sure of himself. His ego, talent, and his small member made a regretful and disappointing evening.) Well,he did smoke lots of crack and drank too much Russian Vodka.He was choked to death,by James Bond on the Orient Express with own Garrot Watch. Vesper Lyne. Quit worrying about the size of your dick. Quit trying to just score. Grow up enough to care about who you're fucking whether it's once or lifetime; learn a woman's body, learn her secrets, learn to find her cues. You'll enjoy your dick so much more, and so will she. Oh,Bruce Banner is hung like the Hulk.Shit ,he is the Hulk. Betty Ross. 10.1k Views This is a sandwich.This is a sandwich on drugs.any questions ? From Subway. Yes,I found it laying in between two rails in a subway.My name is Astronaut Brent.I worked here.played here.This is mutant city and there is weird buzzing noise in the background Astronaut Brent. Yes,that sandwich ,Brent talks about.It is 11 inches long and its girth is somehow proportional to the length. Next time you defecate, please, take a look at your waste. Most likely it is gonna be no more than a third of the Subway sandwich. And yet, you are lucky it just came off of your butt. If you don’t believe me, please, gently push it back where it came from. Come back and ask the question again, of course edited by some weirdo like me. A friendly suggestion from someone working in porn: stop watching porn.start watching my porn. I watch midget porn. Here is a susgestion.Stop listening to morons like me from posting the same lamb shot on the net. If a woman liked those sizes, she’d go with fisting.Sorry,I married some foreigner with a small cock. At least it stays firm. Hic! I am drunk.This is a drink post. Janet Hamilton Ps.I shoved the sandwich up my butt.I still have pickles and Pine Apple in my rear. 20.3k Views · The average woman doesn’t care about penis size at all unless they are size queens. True size queens are extremely rare and porn stars, cam performers etc., who specialize in being size queens are always cautious about taking care not to overdo it so that they don’t experience prolapse. I am a small dick fan,who has the intellectual intelligence of a brick. Kathleen Aves. 0.k Views · I am always surprised at how many men obsess over penis size and equate it to better self esteem and confidence. Y’all need to chill about penis endowment and work on more important matters like succeeding in life.Y'all need to see my critters.Jephro to is surfing in the family pool. Ellie May Clanpet The real question a heterosexual man with a big penis needs to ask is, where are they going to find a woman who can ride their ginormous flagpole? How will you be able to fit inside an average woman without straightening out her intestines and pushing her liver into her stomach? LOL LOL.Yes,my real name is LOL of the planet Beta 7. Anal sex will be out of the question. Can you imagine? You might as well start up a human rotisserie spit, or volunteer such a penis for the Olympic high jump pole. Mike Millions You could go to strip clubs and be the pole. When they put out those strips on roads to count traffic congestion, you could technically lay out that penis and give very accurate feedback. I could go on and on.I've dated my cousin Kal El of the distant planet Krypton.He has a giant cock.F u,Mort Weisberg.I can date my cousin.You and Darth Shooter are total dicks.No one cares what you think. Kara Zorel of the distant planet Krypton. 11.6k Views · Are you nuts!? No,but obviously you are. The average woman’s vagina is about five inches deep but can be between three to seven inches in depth. Where exactly do you expect to put this massive penis? In our ear canal? It sure as hell isn't going to fit in our vagina, not fully, anyway. By the way,what is a Vivian anyway ? Crazy Nancy. Get over this obsession with penis size. It's the source of way too much cultural misinformation, anxiety, preoccupation, and misdirected and wasted energies, and besides, it is simply not the be all and end all of what things truly do affect a woman's pleasure. Victor Von Doom. In fact, since only an estimated 30% of women reach orgasm through penetration alone, you spend 99% of your time obsessing over your size and other people's size while you’re missing out on what actually gives a woman pleasure! A big,but penis.Steve Trevor is huge.! Diana Prince. Develop things that matter, like that inner world of yours and your inner skills as well—like communication, sharing, and listening—focusing on and honing those inside things women value, more than focusing on what’s on the outside, because those inward things will be what engages a woman at a deeper and more rewarding level for her. Besides, the outside things really can’t be easily changed, while those inside things can accommodate unlimited change. Put your energy where you’ll get the biggest payback for your time spent in making yourself a better lover. Besides,Reed Richards,my husband has a freakishly huge one and I am not about to share. 34k Views · *2 Susan Richards How many women would prefer a 12-inch penis over a 10-inch one, and vice versa? What we know from Quora is that men are fascinated by penis size. Women, not so much. I always think it is interesting that men ask these questions given that the size of their penises is fixed. You cannot change the size of your penis. So it your penis is X size, how useful is it to you to find out if women prefer penises of size Y or size Z? Madame Zora.Size Queen Bitch. Fuck all this.This is a church.Please stop cursing.Ok.So fuck you.bitches.Your spoiling the taste of this wonderful Velvet cake. I want to dominate the conversation about my round robin discussion about 150 ways to eat Pine Apple.You know you can get pine apple in cider.You can clean your floor with it.You can fashion it into a dildo.You can cut it up and going it out Windows at people. Crazy Nancy Von Nutball. Watch out! She'll be running you down with Juggernaut. Crazy Nancy .Could you shut the duck up a wee bit ? There are other people on the planet.Not everyone enjoys Egg Nogg and Keash.And an ongoing round robin discussion of Pine Apple and how it spoiled the taste of Velvet Cake. Go take a Stress Pill. Pastor Ward Bond. I'm crazy Nancy.Yes,the one in the newspaper.My landlord stood the door off my house again.Where is Evil Joe.He looks like the comic papers Henry.Where is Skinny Joe ?his dick is tiny ? Where is Purvis and his 13 inch cock. Crazy Nancy What we know from research is that most women tend not to place that much importance on penis size unless the penis in question is abnormally small or abnormally large. Your question is about abnormally large penises. Dr.Dong. You are asking about penises of a size that would, if completely inserted, most likely cause pain. If you search the net you’ll find that there are guides written to tell people how to prepare to receive a penis of that size, and that preparation is usually necessary. Think about having a 10 or 12 inch penis inserted in your anus - an anus can accommodate objects far longer than any vagina. I do! I do! Jason Crispy. I would to shove my whole 13inch up your ass,Jesus Joe Brewster. *2 13 inches Don Purvis Oh yes,I would. Jesus Joe. As points out, the majority of women do not experience orgasm from pure penis-in-vagina intercourse. It doesn’t matter how large the penis, how small the penis, how long intercourse lasts, how strong the male is. As incredibly fun as they can be, penises simply aren’t the greatest producers of female orgasms. Madame Soda. FWIW, true or not, the buzz on the net is that men with very large penises are mostly bad in bed, because they rely on size rather than skill, and, as stated above, size is not so important. Or helpful. James Franco I hope this information is helpful, and that we are not discouraging you from your interest in large penises. *2 Daisy Marie Bigcock Lover. Hey,Doc ! Look.I got a lasso. Don Purvis 8.6k Views · Other discussions are about Beshine ,Tina Small or Chelsea Charms.Not everything is about big cocks,despite the Cracked But will tell you.But then Cracked Magazine was for people not smart enough to be able to read Mad Magazine or even it's Marvel Comics poorer cousin Crazy,actually written by a bunch of idiots. But it's not all bad, as the site points out. "Large penises tend to attract members of the opposite gender, as well as provide a grand source of entertainment.".There are some well mannered people,but there are a few nuts in the bunch.The mannered people are ok,but the bad speed watch out.Avoid them like the plague,just the guy,saying he prefers screwing his vacuum , or a roast chicken or the fleet admiral ,who screws his Rachel Welch pillow. It also seems attract A few female Size Queens with some bad attitude towards any heterosexual male,who doesn't fawn over them like a goddess.Call them out for being rude or mean,and guess what you get banned,but they don't.The gullible monitors just believe a d me too,you.I obviously,these women have issues beyond just for big cock.I got banned twice by responding to someone called Tiny Princess.It is obvious,Tiny Princess has a tiny brain and a total bitch streak.She is obviously black and from the UK or so she claims.She got all mad because I disagreed with thinking all black men are all hung like elephants.The subject is up skeptical thinking,but for Tiny Princess,it is utter law. The problem is not the members of the opposite gender or maybe it is.Not sure,but the problem is certain members,some male and others female,suffer from bad behavior.Their list big cock has turned into rude,crude vengeful trolls.Cross and the sheepishly cowarding managers dump you and not the ride bitches.Makes you wonder how these people deal with people in the real world. "A large penis is a friend as well as a foe. Treat it as such." ® Doc Brown *2 What make me laugh,is the discussion seems about the greatness of having a big cock and often ends,with her isn't nice to really have a small dick.I often think the author of author's despite saying that they are women,are just some small cocked Mike Millions prick with a small dick,so jealous of guys with big cock,write up a fantastic fantasy about the joys of being small.And if your between 8 and 12 inches,well fuckkkkkkk youuuuu.!????.Go such off your big dick,like Jonah Falcon and shove it up some horse ass. Search E-mail Address GQ a cab may for dumb men Style,if your here,you have no style. Grooming.Yes.I use the public toilet Best Stuff-trolls are all bad. Recommends,nothing but shit. Culture.Assholes culture Fitness.none Travel & Eats .I eat shit GQ LIVE Menu.China Search.none Newsletter.No thanks.I read the Metro.All the news not fit to print. GQ The Real Story of Donald Trump Jr and tiny penis Facebook. Twitter Email Illustration by Nigel Buchanan Best of GQ. The Real Story of Donald Trump Jr. Photo of Julia Ioffe BY JULIA IOFFE June 20, 2018 All he ever wanted was to make his dad proud, but things have never turned out quite right for Donald Trump Jr. Even now, despite finding his purpose as a bombastic star of the far right, Junior’s personal life is in shambles and the specter of Robert Mueller looms large. As Julia Ioffe discovers in talking to old friends and Trump World insiders, it’s never been trickier to be the president’s son. On a recent Thursday afternoon, Donald Trump Jr. buckled himself into a coach seat on a packed plane—just like any nameless fellow might—and flew west to Utah. There, for a few blissful spring days at a hunting retreat far from his myriad worries in New York and Washington, Donald Trump Jr., eldest son and namesake of the president of the United States, was simply Don*. He rode through the mountains, gabbing with Robert O'Neill, the former Navy SEAL who has said he was first into bin Laden's bedroom and who, after taking careful aim over the shoulder of the terrorist's youngest wife, shot him square in the head, killing him instantly. O'Neill is a big supporter of the president, but he and Don* didn't talk politics. “I was really impressed with his knowledge of ballistics and harvesting animals,” O'Neill told me. “I was a sniper in the SEALs, and he knew pretty much what I knew about ballistics.” More than once during their time together, O'Neill says, Donald Trump Jr. called attention to the fact that he must come off like a walking contradiction. “You didn't think the son of a billionaire would be a hunter,” he said again and again, according to O'Neill. Don* is hardly shy about this particular passion. His neighbors in upstate New York complain that his tract of land there sounds like a military-grade shooting range (perhaps ironic, given that he's appeared in a promotional video for a manufacturer of gun silencers). EDITOR’S PICK Melania Trump on Her Rise, Her Family Secrets, and Her True Political Views: “Nobody Will Ever Know” Culture Melania Trump on Her Rise, Her Family Secrets, and Her True Political Views: “Nobody Will Ever Know” For much of Don* junior's life, the hunter's camo he's worn has helped him not to disappear but to stand out, to differentiate himself from his father, the real estate tycoon who never understood his son's fascination with the outdoors. (“I am not a believer in hunting, and I'm surprised they like it,” Trump told TMZ of his two eldest sons.) Only when he began campaigning for the White House did Donald Trump see some value in his son's bloody pastime. According to Sam Nunberg, a Trump adviser at the time, when an invitation arrived from the governor of Iowa to go hunting ahead of the state's crucial caucuses, Trump joked, “Don*, you can finally do something for me—you can go hunting.” It's hard being Don*. Struggling to make a mark. Living as the junior to Trump senior. Existing as the shy kid who takes solace in the outdoors. Growing into a man who desperately wants his father's love and pride yet is always mindful of the distance between them. His struggles are compounded by the perception that his life of privilege ought to be effortless. Though to understand the strange gantlet of duty and drama that has marked that life is to wonder how anything would be simple for Don*ald Trump Jr. “I think Don* gets it a lot. Everyone talks about Ivanka, but Don* also has a lot of pressure on him,” says a former Trump adviser. “Everyone wants approval from the father, especially if the father is Trump. He has a special place in his heart for Ivanka. But Don* is the eldest son, he's named after him, he's doing the nitty-gritty on the real estate, he's got a lot of responsibility, and Trump is tough on everybody. He's the alpha male. He sees his son as somebody he has to groom.” When a Brazilian journalist asked Don* in 2010 whether there was much pressure being Donald junior, he replied, “There probably shouldn't be. But there is for me, because you want to please someone like that, and he's a perfectionist. There's definitely always that shadow that follows you around, like how is this guy, the son of someone so good at what he does, going to act?” According to his first wife, Ivana, Donald Trump was never keen on bequeathing his name to anybody. It was Ivana who wanted to call their newborn Donald junior. “You can't do that!” Trump is quoted as saying in Ivana's memoir, Raising Trump. “What if he's a loser?” Don* tells his own story about coming into the world on December 31, 1977. “I like to joke that my dad wanted to be able to claim me as a dependent on his taxes for 1977,” he once told Forbes, “so he told my mom she had to have me before midnight and, if she didn't, he'd make her take a cab home.” (Ivana wrote about her labor being induced by doctors.) So began the difficult, defining struggle of Donald Trump Jr.'s life—to make himself useful while carrying a name so beloved by the man who bestowed it that he put it in gold letters on buildings all over the world. When he was growing up, his dad called him Donny—a moniker the elder Trump would never go by. “It's a name I hate,” he explained in The Art of the Deal. Fraught though their relationship has sometimes been—at one point Junior refused to speak to his father for a year—Don* has lately found improbable purpose and renown as a savage defender of his father. His once private desires to win his father's approval now come packaged as angry tweets and memes tearing down his dad's opponents as illogical, histrionic socialists. At age 40, he has become like every other angry white man raging on the Internet, exorcising his psychic traumas through ghastly rhetoric and febrile conspiracy theories, like when he retweeted Roseanne Barr's false claim that George Soros, a Holocaust survivor, was actually a Nazi collaborator. 7633332 Ten-year-old Donald Trump Jr. in 1988. Ron Galella, Ltd. This sort of thing has endeared him not only to pro-Trump Republicans but also to the populist fringe that propelled Trump to power. “Don junior is royalty,” says Mike Cernovich, a right-wing activist. “Don junior is loved by the base. He's accessible, he's in the trenches, he's sharing the memes, pushing out stories that other people aren't. It shows that he's reading what everybody else is reading. I know it's a really dumb litmus test for a politician, but he's the one you'd want to have a beer with.” Don's bona fides as an outdoorsman have helped, too, and have earned him some sway in his father's administration. It was Don* who recommended that former Navy SEAL Ryan Zinke—a fellow hunting enthusiast who once reportedly referred to Hillary Clinton as “the Antichrist”—should be tapped as Trump's secretary of the interior. To the president's most ardent supporters, Don* is venerated as a natural incarnation of everything the MAGA brand stands for: transgressive and defiant white, rural masculinity. “He's a fighter,” says one Breitbart editor. “The stuff he's focused on is the stuff the conservative movement is focused on. It's not an act. With him, I think it's genuine.” To people who have known Don* for decades, this identity is jarring. He had always loved the outdoors. But the use of the Pepe the Frog meme and tweeting about taking away half his daughter's Halloween candy “because it's never too early to teach her about socialism”—that isn't the Don* they recognize. “I don't remember him having political views,” says a friend of Don*'s from college. “You've been hearing his dad for a long time,” but as for Don*'s views, “I didn't see anything emerge until the campaign.” For years, Don* seemed contentedly inattentive to politics. “He probably had the opinion that most New Yorkers have of politicians—they're full of shit,” says sometime Trump business partner Felix Sater, who worked with Don* on the ill-fated Trump SoHo project in Manhattan. “He wasn't political. He didn't like politics.” So old friends were shocked by the demagogic fury he unleashed. “What's surprising is that the tone and the rhetoric are so”—the college friend grasped for a term—“so Fox News-ish. The anger is surprising. None of us would've guessed that he would've been so outspoken in either direction. It hit me strange to see this guy that was a friend in college all over the news in this way.” Those who have seen the political transformation from hunting-businessman father to the most prominent MAGA troll explain it as a simple, sporting calculation. The snarling political persona, the friend contends, is a show for an audience of one. “He wasn't a political animal until this started,” says Charlie Kirk, who ran the Trump campaign's outreach to millennials, of Don*'s partisan awakening during the 2016 election. “He did it to help his dad. He got dragged into this fight out of loyalty.” Being noticed was always something of a struggle. That evening he was born, little Don* was left by his parents to the care of the hospital's nursery. His father headed home to celebrate New Year's Eve, while Ivana put a boa and a mink over her hospital gown and went to visit a girlfriend recovering from back surgery on another floor of the hospital. Don* had little luck with the first of his nannies, under whose watch he both broke his leg and nearly drowned. From there, a succession of caregivers followed, though Ivana was also active in her three children's upbringing. In her telling, she instilled strict Eastern European discipline in the house. By several accounts, Don* came in for the most punishment. “Don* got in trouble with me more often than the other kids, probably because he was the oldest,” Ivana wrote in her memoir. Largely absent from childhood tales is the father. “He would love them, but he did not know how to speak to them in the children's way of thinking,” Ivana said of her ex-husband on The Wendy Williams Show last year. “He was able to speak to them only when they came from university, when eventually he was able to speak business to them. Otherwise, he really did not know how to handle the kids.” The interactions were apparently alien in both directions. “The children,” Ivana wrote in her book, “didn't know how to relate to him, either.” Nowadays, Don* puts a happy gloss on his dad's parenting style—which he believes, in hindsight, was career prep. “He's a business guy first and foremost, so we spent a lot of time with him, but it was always in a business environment,” Don* told Oprah in 2011. Some paternal lessons have stuck with Don*, who tries still to parse the old fatherly instruction for the faintest wisdom. For instance, a key Trump mantra, according to both Ivana and Don*, neither of whom agreed to be interviewed for this story, was “Don*'t trust anyone.” Trump would test his children on this maxim. “He'd say, ‘Do you trust me, your own father?’ ” Don* once recalled. “We'd say, ‘Of course we do!’ And he'd say, ‘What did I just tell you? You didn't take the lesson!’ It was certainly an interesting Trump moment,” Don* continued, talking at a pressured, sober clip, “because it's not something you'd see any conventional parent-child conversation go that way, especially not fully understanding what the concept of trust was.” If the lessons didn't take, Don* had his father's own example to demonstrate untrustworthiness. On the day before the boy's 12th birthday, Marla Maples—who was then carrying on an affair with Donald Trump—crossed paths with Ivana at Bonnie's in Aspen and uttered her nine infamous words: “I'm Marla, and I love your husband. Do you?” According to Ivana's book, Don* witnessed the whole scene. When divorce proceedings began and the paparazzi set up camp outside Trump Tower and Don*'s school, Ivana decided to explain the situation to her children. Ivanka, 8, and Eric, 6, got the sanitized version. Twelve-year-old Don*, Ivana concluded, “could handle hearing the truth.” After being told about his father's mistress and the fact that his parents would never live together again, Don* stopped speaking to his father. Soon after that, as Trump engaged Ivana in an epic public feud, he dispatched a bodyguard to his triplex apartment with instructions to bring his elder boy down to his office. Don*, still not talking to his father, descended with the bodyguard to the 28th floor, and a few minutes later, Ivana, who described all this in her book, got a phone call. It was Trump, looking for some leverage by announcing that he was going to keep Don* and raise him alone. “Okay, keep him,” Ivana said she told him. “I have two other kids to raise.” A few minutes later—his bluff out-bluffed—Trump ordered his boy to be taken back upstairs. “Donald never had any intention of keeping his son,” Ivana wrote. In his telling, Don* was caught in that lonely isthmus of awareness where one doesn't understand everything but knows enough to be deeply wounded by it. “Listen, it's tough to be a 12-year-old,” he told New York magazine in 2004. “You're not quite a man, but you think you are. You think you know everything. Being driven to school every day and you see the front page and it's divorce! “Best Sex I Ever Had”! And you don't even know what that means. At that age, kids are naturally cruel. Your private life becomes very public, and I didn't have anything to do with it: My parents did.” Don*, Ivana noted, “expressed his pain with anger, and he was really angry.” Don's reprieve from the glare of Manhattan had always been the summers spent with his maternal grandparents in rural Czechoslovakia. But between the separation and divorce, his grandfather Milos died suddenly of a heart attack. It was yet another blow to Don*, for whom Milos was a sort of father he never had. “Being in Czechoslovakia with my grandfather was the most memorable time in my life,” Don* wrote in an aside in Ivana's book. “My grandpa would say, ‘There's the woods. See you at dark!’ He taught me how to fish, rock-climb, camp, shoot with a bow and an air rifle. Czechoslovakian summers were my introduction to ‘the great outdoors’ and an era that lives in me that I hand down to my children.… I miss him. I will always miss him.” People close to Don* say Milos is the key to understanding him. The imprint stamped on Don* as a boy by his grandfather is still evident, says Anthony Scaramucci, a Trump ally who briefly served as White House communications chief: “He's a very down-to-earth, grounded guy, and I think a lot of that comes from his mom's parents, who he used to summer with. Spending several months in Communist Eastern Europe, seeing the difference between what was happening in Eastern Europe in the 1980s and his life in New York—it gives grounding and perspective.” For a child raised in a gilded triplex, Don* seems to have gotten a disproportionate share of what pain there was to go around. Shortly after his grandfather's death, Don* found Bridget, one of his nannies, passed out from a heart attack in the basement of Ivana's Greenwich home. He called the ambulance and the adults, but she was pronounced dead at the hospital. When his mother remarried, her new husband's son roughed up and choked the then adolescent Don*. On top of that, when Junior, at age 15, tried to take a girl on a date, it immediately made it into the tabloids: Ivana wanted the world to know that she had armed him with condoms. “Poor Don*. He really got the brunt of everything,” Ivana wrote. “No wonder Don* likes to go in the woods and escape from everything.” Illustration by Nigel Buchanan When Don* headed off to college at the University of Pennsylvania, his father's alma mater, his relationship with his dad seemingly hadn't fully recovered. Mad as he was at Donald Trump, Don was also Donald Trump, but smaller, less accomplished, and more wounded. He assumed a posture of studied normalcy and stuck to being Don, rather than Donald Trump Jr. “He wasn't quick to volunteer his name or put it out there who he was or try to use that to his advantage,” says the college friend. “I remember thinking that if he used his name more, he probably could've gotten more girls.” A freshman-year friend, Dan Friedman, remembers a strange conversation on that theme. Friedman says that one day, as he and Don sat in a dining hall, Friedman jokingly warned him to watch out for girls—gold-digger types—who would try to take advantage of him. “And he said, ‘What do you mean? I don't know what you're talking about,’ ” Friedman recalls. “I think he was playing dumb; he knew what I was talking about. He didn't go as far as denying his identity, but it was very clear that he wanted to downplay it.” It wasn't just the Trump name that Don avoided; he apparently steered clear of his father, too. A former classmate recalls how “Don's dad came to campus to give a speech, and he refused to go because he was mad at his dad over divorcing his mom.” (The Trump camp disputes this classmate's recollection, claiming Don was seated in the front row.) Don's anger expressed itself in other ways, too. “He had a reputation as the kind of guy who would get to drinking and start fights,” says a college acquaintance. “He was a fall-down drunk.” In June 1999, the summer before Don's senior year, Fred Trump, Donald's own overbearing and emotionally abusive father, passed away. Don didn't seem to feel the same private grief that he'd harbored after the death of Milos. He asked a few of his friends to go with him to the wake because he didn't seem comfortable being alone at the event. “A few of us went to the wake with him, and I just remember how peculiar the vibe was,” recalls Don's college friend. “It was the only time I met his dad. It just had a cocktail-party vibe. It was just odd.” (The Trump camp disputes this, claiming Don did not bring friends to his grandfather's wake.) After graduating, Don escaped to Aspen and spent a year and a half doing what he loves most, hunting and fishing—and avoiding what he must have felt was inevitable: going to work for his father. But in 2001, Don did just that. He succumbed to the centripetal force that is the Trump Organization—“It's very hard to veer from that track,” Don has said—by joining the family firm. Very quickly his job became doing whatever chore was in the offing—a sui generis job he's held for years. “Don, like most other people, gets assigned to a project and winds up overseeing all the various aspects, from construction, marketing, design,” says Sater. “Sometimes he works in tandem with Ivanka or Eric, and then reports to Trump. They share or split main responsibilities. He's worked on pretty much everything over the last ten years. Don has had his hands in just about every Trump project over the years.” In those early days back in New York, the assiduously private Don also found that the tabloids, which had made his parents famous, were waiting for him. Just before his 25th birthday, Don went to see Chris Rock at Manhattan's Comedy Cellar. He got a little drunk. Sources later told the New York Post that “people at a neighboring table thought Trump was reacting too enthusiastically to Rock's ethnic humor.” Three couples said they asked Don to pipe down but that he refused. Finally, two young men his age took matters into their own hands—the matters being their beer steins, which they lobbed directly at Don's triangular brown mane. Don* was taken to St. Vincent's to have his head stitched up, and according to the Post, the two barroom vigilantes were released on bail. (“I'm going to get those motherfuckers, that's for sure,” Trump senior told the New York Daily News.) Eventually, Don stopped drinking and started dressing like his father, a cartoon of a Manhattan capitalist, all pinstripes and wide lapels and pastel satin ties. He mended things with his father, or at the very least gained some awareness of his dad's view of the divorce. By 2004, he was telling New York magazine that perhaps it wasn't just his father's fault: “But when you're living with your mother, it's easy to be manipulated. You get a one-sided perspective.” In 2006, he referred to himself as “a brat” for having once hung up on his dad. Somewhere along the line, outsiders could see why the two men had the same name. “Don* -Donald Trump,Juniors also has a big personality,” Nunberg says. “He's got that larger-than-life persona, like his father; he has his big, nice office on the 25th floor; and you hear him beating the shit out of someone on the phone, like his father.” (Another source warned me about Don's* “quick temper.”) In interviews from this time, he is an eager carnival barker, selling his father's brand while also eagerly trying to demonstrate how much he has learned about business—the business. Soon, he glimpsed the wisdom of lending his valuable name to other people's projects. In 2010, he signed on to help hawk Cambridge Who's Who, a self-billed “leading professional branding and networking organization.” In a promotional video for the firm, Don* says over the soft tones of a keyboard that “Cambridge Who's Who is your exclusive, by-invitation-only, private PR firm.” Don.Don.Don.We tabloid was clowns want you for president. The company, headquartered “in Long Island's premier office building,” turned out to be less than premier. Its then president, Randy Narod, once owned a nightclub and a bagel store and had been barred from the securities industry after sending someone to sit for his exam. By the time Don came on as a spokesman, Cambridge Who's Who had amassed some 400 complaints filed with the Better Business Bureau, according to The New York Times. Sorry,but your spoiling the wonderful taste of this wonderful Velvet cake. Crazy Jewish Debbie Diblie. I see t my three and a half cents a week on that came ! Gene London Despite some successes, like overseeing the construction of the Trump International Hotel & Tower in Chicago, Don* Donald Junior continued to get his famous name caught up in the wrong deals. In 2006, he helped launch a mortgage brokerage called Trump Mortgage, bragging that it was the “only company in a $3 trillion industry that anyone has actually heard of.” Within months it was defunct, an early casualty of the housing crisis. In 2006, he was kicked off the condo board of the Trump apartment building at 220 Riverside Drive in Manhattan, amid board members' concerns that $80,000 of the condo's money had disappeared on account of nebulous “office expenses.” (He was eventually reinstated.) Sorry,but your spoiling the wonderful taste of this wonderful Velvet cake. Crazy Jewish Debbie Diblie. I see t my three and a half cents a week on that came ! Gene London The setbacks seemed not to trouble Don*, who never had the requisite hunger to be the true titan of commerce, the man he saw in his father. Don* was happier hunting or sitting by the pool at Mar-a-Lago than closing deals. He enjoyed the fruits of his father's labors more than he liked laboring for more fruit. “He has a more balanced life,” a source close to Don* told me. “It's harder to become a captain of industry if you don't make a lot of sacrifices.” Sorry,but your spoiling the wonderful taste of this wonderful Velvet cake. Crazy Jewish Debbie Diblie. I see t my three and a half cents a week on that came ! Gene London The fruits are generally Nutball Nancy and her Pine Apple Velvet cake Your ruining the taste of this wonderful Velvet cake.Wahhhh.Will someone please push my Imperial Walker out the way.I came all the way Knome Alaska to get to this HUHC dinner at the University of Pennsylvania.Jesus Joe.Swallow my big dick. Sorry,but your spoiling the wonderful taste of this wonderful Velvet cake. Crazy Jewish Debbie Diblie. I see t my three and a half cents a week on that came ! Gene London Don.Don.Don.Della Don Don.Don Don Della Don Dee oh . “I feel bad for him, honestly,” said a person at the 2016 Trump Tower meeting.The person was known to be homeless bum Mike Millions. Sorry,but your spoiling the wonderful taste of this wonderful Velvet cake. Crazy Jewish Debbie Diblie. I see t my three and a half cents a week on that came ! Gene London Mike Millions uses Meloxum And so Don* has seemed content to take direction from his father—and not merely on matters professional. One night in 2003, while father and son were attending an event, Donald Trump spotted a blonde woman and pointed her out to his son. She was Vanessa Haydon, a young model who had made news dating Leonardo DiCaprio and a Saudi prince. “Vanessa walked in front of me at this big fashion show,” Donald Trump recalled on Oprah's show in 2011. “She looked so beautiful, I said, ‘Don*, that's the person you should marry.’ ” According to Vanessa's own recollection, shared with the Times, the forgetful Trump accidentally introduced her to his son twice. Then, when she ran into Don* several weeks later, she remembered him as “the one with the retarded dad.” Trumpanzee begin to clap with hands and feet. Sorry,but your spoiling the wonderful taste of this wonderful Velvet cake. Crazy Jewish Debbie Diblie. I see t my three and a half cents a week on that came ! Gene London Mike Millions uses Meloxum Despite his father's hand in their coupling, Don* earned a scolding from his dad over the way he proposed—a Trumpian publicity stunt in which he scored a free engagement ring by popping the question in a jewelry store at the Short Hills mall in New Jersey. “You have a name that is hot as a pistol,” Trump senior told Larry King, lamenting the situation. “You have to be very careful with things like this.” But Larry King said "I would rather Lynda Carter on my show.I like Wonder Woman.She has big boobs.I.Like big boobs." " That Tina Small.She has some really big boobs.Big.Huge.Massively huge.So does Chelsea Charms and Beshine.Get them on my show.I want some big goober chicks on my show,not some tiny dick pseudo celebrities like the Trumps " By all appearances, the stylish Vanessa fit right in as the newest Trump. But she had her own complicated adolescence. Her wealthy father, Manhattan attorney Charles Haydon, was actually her stepfather. As newly minted Haydons, Vanessa and her sister were catapulted into a life of posh prep schools and a home on the Upper East Side. Sorry,but your spoiling the wonderful taste of this wonderful Velvet cake. Crazy Jewish Debbie Diblie. I see t my three and a half cents a week on that came ! Gene London Mike Millions uses Meloxum Vanessa's rebellion, a friend from that time recalls, was very specific: She dated a young man named Valentin Rivera, who told people he was a foot soldier for the Latin Kings, a Hispanic gang. Rivera, who recently went public in an interview with the New York Post, was raised in an apartment atop the Yorkville branch of the New York Public Library, where his father was the caretaker. According to the article, Rivera delivered weed around the city. Vanessa apparently reveled in all this. “She talked with an urban, gangster accent,” the friend remembers. “She wore big hoop earrings, hair slicked back. She thought she was a gangster. She had a gangster boyfriend, and she acted like a gangster herself. She was somebody who went out of her way to intimidate people by having a scary boyfriend that could hurt people.” Sorry,but your spoiling the wonderful taste of this wonderful Velvet cake. Crazy Jewish Debbie Diblie. I see t my three and a half cents a week on that came ! Gene London Mike Millions uses Meloxum Vanessa seemed very much in love with Rivera, as much as a teenager could be, and despite her family's disapproval, when Rivera found himself in Rikers Island for assault, she visited him there. The couple eventually went their separate ways, and in the years that followed, Rivera, who could not be reached for comment, was jailed several times for crimes ranging from weapons charges to negligent homicide. Before Vanessa married his son, though, Donald Trump apparently did his due diligence and discovered that his future daughter-in-law had dated a Latino gangster—a bad look for an image-obsessed family. Trump called Vanessa into his office and confronted her about her relationship with Rivera. Vanessa flatly denied it.Donald Trump showed her,his tiny penis.It took three hours to get semi hard. Donald Trump,Junior was then anally rape By Kevin Taylor s Blue and massive 16 inch cock,in the Gulag Trump Hotel and Casino. "Take it bitch.Take it all,bitch."Blue " love Lucky Charms without Marshmallows.! " Don Junior screams. By the time his father ran for president, Don* had cultivated a public image as a kind of prudent sidekick. He appeared on The Apprentice as an earnest good cop to his dad's bellicose “You're fired” character. As Don* peddled his father's business ventures around the world, he came into plenty of contact with Russians. “In terms of high-end product influx into the U.S., Russians make up a pretty disproportionate cross section of a lot of our assets, say, in Dubai and certainly with our project in SoHo and anywhere in New York,” he said at an industry conference in 2008. (The Trump SoHo project, which he developed with Sater, ended up being sued for fraud, resulting in a settlement.) “We see a lot of money pouring in from Russia.” Donald Trump wanted to build Trump Towers Casino Hotel in the Russian Gulag�� Don* infamously wrote back to them, “I love it.” "I love LA." " We love it. " Don* repeatedly tried to develop Trump properties in Russia, but despite the country's lucrative oil boom—and the gilded dovetailing of Trump and Russian aesthetics—he couldn't quite manage Moscow and its corruption. “It is a question of who knows who, whose brother is paying off who, et cetera,” he said after making half a dozen trips there in a year and a half. “It really is a scary place.” The most infamous of his failed Russian deals—the one that backfired monumentally and now may imperil his father's presidency—had nothing to do with real estate. In June 2016, when a set of Russians with oblique ties to the Kremlin reached out to Don* through an intermediary promising damaging information on Hillary Clinton that “would be very useful to your father,” Junior couldn't have been more curious. “If it's what you say,” Don* infamously wrote back to them, “I love it.” "I love LA." " We love it. " According to evidence and testimony released by the Senate Judiciary Committee, Don* next made a few calls, a couple to Russia and a couple to a blocked number. (Investigators pointed out that Donald Trump Sr. uses a blocked number.) Don* then set up a meeting at Trump Tower with the Russians, one of whom—lawyer Natalia Veselnitskaya—was said to be connected to the Russian prosecutor general, an old ally of Vladimir Putin. And so on June 9, 2016, Don*—along with his brother-in-law, Jared Kushner, and Trump campaign manager Paul Manafort—began a fateful confab in a conference room in Trump Tower. According to a person who was there, after some pleasantries about the view of Central Park, Don* got straight to it. Don* Kursher. “So I believe you have some information for us?” he asked. Veselnitskaya began reading from prepared remarks about DNC donors the Ziff brothers, their alleged tax evasion, and the connection she saw between them and Putin critic Bill Browder. According to testimony, Don* tried to get the conversation back on track. “ ‘So can you show us how does this money go to Hillary?’ ” two of the participants recall him asking. Veselnitskaya shot back, “Why don't you do your own research on her? We gave you the idea.” Don*.Don*.Did you suck his tiny dick,since your so personal with him. According to one of the participants in the meeting, Don* began to realize he wasn't going to be handed what he was hoping for. “The light just went out in his eyes,” the participant told me recently. “He was totally disinterested.” Don* shit his pants like his father.He is an asshole,like his father before him. Then die,Je di. Emperor Trump zaps Don* Jr. with Forces lightning. "Father,please." Robert Mueller picks up Trump,still blasting force lightning and throws him down the long reactor shaft under the White House.Donald trump hit two levels before he exploded somewhere below. "You haven't heard the last of Donald Trump." "Yes,Don*.I am your real father."Robert Mueller "Cool.Donald trump was an asshole anyway." Donald Trump,Jr. Veselnitskaya then went into a long, tangled exposition about the Magnitsky Act and the adoption of Russian children, but it seemed like the two sides were now talking past each other, says the participant. Manafort seemed to fall asleep. Kushner grew agitated, asked why they were talking about adoptions, and left. According to the meeting participant, Don* recognized that things had turned futile—but offered to stay in touch. The participant said Don* had a parting message for the Russians: “ ‘When we win’—he said when, not if—‘when we win, come back and see us again.’ ” Don*.Don*.Danger Danger Will Robinson. That meeting, which Don* had hoped would prove useful, has since become as useful as a hole in the head. It is now a prime focus of the investigation led by special counsel Robert Mueller into potential collusion between Russia and the Trump campaign. “I think he regrets taking the meeting,” a source close to Don* told me. “Does he regret it because he thinks he did something wrong? No. He regrets it because it ended up causing a situation that wasted a lot of time and money.” Don* went off and played his small dick.Donald Trump,Junior. The New York Times recently reported that Don* also met with an Israeli and an emissary from two Arab princes seeking to help his father win the election. “Maybe he's not an intellectual, but he tried to be useful for his family,” the participant from the Russia meeting told me. “I feel bad for him, honestly.” Last fall, when Don* was called before the Senate Judiciary Committee, which was investigating potential links between his father's campaign and the Russian government, he seemed oblivious to the gravity of the mess he'd created. “In the breaks between the questions, he was making dumb jokes about how absurd it was that he was even there,” says a source familiar with the investigation. “He had this sense of impunity at a time when it was dangerous, when it seemed like it was the Hill that would get them.” Don* .Don* Who. Do they teach your morons to switch names around or do you just hang the keys like Fred J.Muggs. Instead of being wary of his questioners, Don* wanted to be helpful and calmly acknowledged that he had corresponded with WikiLeaks during the election. He then happily turned the correspondence over to congressional investigators, helpful as ever. “He wasn't embarrassed to be revealing that he had exchanged DMs with WikiLeaks,” says the source, even though it was by this point abundantly clear to the American officials that WikiLeaks had links to Russian intelligence. “He's too stupid to be malicious.” Don wanted this but it was Don West. Don,get the lasers guns.Smith fucked again. John Robinson. Your ruining the taste of my Velvet Cake. Don,shoot the crazy bitch first. Crazy Nancy. The source's impression of Don was that he, like seemingly everyone else in Trump's orbit, was uselessly trying to impress a man who can only be impressed by himself. “He's hustling and trying to do what he can to contribute but without knowing where the lines are,” the source said of Don, adding ruefully, “He's a sad and tragic figure.” Don Della Vaga. Torro,he makes the sign of the Z. Useful as Don* has tried to be to his father, his blunt re-invention as a political warrior has perhaps been costly in surprisingly personal ways. In March, as Mueller's investigation gathered steam, Vanessa filed for divorce. The New York tabloids, descending on the carrion of yet another Trump marriage, speculated that Don*'s political transformation and volatile social-media presence were to blame. Rumors began to circulate in Trump World that Don* had taken to drinking again.The Don.Don.Don.Don West,birch ? Donny Osmond,birch ? John.Her crazy is laser resistance. Don West. Don Most. Don Della Vaga.Torro. Don Johnson. Too many Don this and that,dumb bitch.This what they call professional writhing ? When news of the divorce broke, the papers dug into Vanessa's past and reported on the marinara fortune she suddenly inherited—a windfall that seemed to free her from Don*, who, the tabloids wrote, had kept her on a tight financial leash. (A rep for Vanessa denied the allegations of money problems between her and Don*.) “Page Six” also unearthed an old affair Don* allegedly had with flash-in-the-pan pop star Aubrey O'Day, whom he'd met on the set of Celebrity Apprentice. It had been Don*'s father, “Page Six” claimed, who'd ordered that illicit relationship to end in 2011. According to another report, Trump's fixer, Michael Cohen, had been called in to keep the story quiet. In Donald Trump,Junior's marriage and in its breach, it seems it was his father who called the shots. Don.Don .Donny of the Comic papers. Hey,don. Whitman Chocolates are great. For her part, O'Day has declined interview requests but continues to fuel conversation. It was revealed that after the illicit romance supposedly ended, O'Day recorded a hardly veiled ballad called “DJT.” And days after news broke this past spring that Don* had moved on to date Fox News host Kimberly Guilfoyle, O'Day wrote on Instagram, “He's still searching for me in every other woman.” The perennial tabloid fascination with Trump-family drama might not surprise Don Trump,Junior, but it apparently now stings him. After a childhood seared by the trauma of divorce, he's keenly aware that his five children are today in the same position he once was. His eldest, Donald Trump III, is now 9—old enough to wonder why his family's struggles are in the papers, much like Don junior once had. “The way he looks at everything about him in the press is ‘What will the kids think?’ ” says Don*'s friend, “and the answer here ain't a good one.” And yet for all the tumult—and for all the lingering legal woe the Mueller probe portends—there's perhaps another way to glimpse these prismatic days of Donald Trump Jr.'s. His father, by virtue of being in the Oval Office, is no longer in the one directly above him, which, by some accounts, has freed Don* up to thrive—to court attention or to settle scores on his own terms. There's little doubt that as a political creature, Don* has grown more sure-footed. Once reportedly derided by Trump campaign staffers as “Fredo,” the Corleone child who can't seem to do anything right except endanger his family legacy, Don* has now become one of Trump's most useful spokesmen. Suddenly,he is Don*.What ? The sun that raped your sister,if you asked me,they would be dead by now.Stella ?Stella ? “It's not that he doesn't want the Trump Organization to succeed, but I think he's enjoying the challenge of his political efforts,” says the source close to Don*. “And it's more exciting than what he's been doing for the last 20 years. This is something new in his life that he happens to be good at.” Don Scaramucci told me about a night in Pittsburgh, just before the election, when he took notice of the effect Junior was starting to have. Don* was scheduled to talk to a crowd that the local officials figured would be about 400. “Over 3,000 showed up to hear him speak,” Scaramucci said, noting that Don* has clearly found a voice and tuned it to a frequency that resonates. And in the coming months, he'll be making a big push to campaign for Republicans ahead of this year's midterms—firing up his father's base. “He's not really even a surrogate; he's a substitute,” Scaramucci told me. “You see the difference?” "3,000 showed up were clones of Crazy Nancy the Nut." says Don Scaramucciwho got the Scaramucch.!he ha.ride em,rowdy yates. Geddout up.Rawhide. Like Republican populists of the past decade, Donmy Trump speaks of “real Americans,” people he defines as “the forgotten people between New York City and Malibu.” It's an improbable notion: that the billionaire's kid from 66 stories above Fifth Avenue is the one who speaks for the disaffected and the overlooked. But it's no less surprising than the faint rumors suggesting that he might someday run for office—a way to finally, perhaps, make a name for himself.Trump Oh great .Don*ald Trump,Junior as President.Another moron in the White Boy House.Hey,Millennials...Once you stop texting and driving.Stop texting and walking ,and get hit by stop texting and driving,go vote for Don*ny Trump,Junior.He plans to build a wall out of his father's dead bullshit. Julia Ioffe is a GQ correspondent. She wrote about the rise of Melania Trump in the June 2016 issue.Julia Ioffe gets paid to actually wrote this tabloid crap. How big is the average dick? Porn worships and fetishizes massive dicks, but does the size of your penis actually make you good or bad in bed? Each dick size has something new to offer. Some people like to get fucked by a big dick, others prefer fat dicks or skinny dicks, or they might like a small one that perfectly hits their pleasure spot. Men are notoriously bad at reporting their own size. A study by the Kinsey Institute in 1989 found that “All of the subjects who initially claimed an erect cock length of ten inches or more turned out on re-estimation to have a considerably smaller cock length”, with one participant claiming to have an eleven inch dick being 6.5inches in reality. The same study found that 30 percent of American men had the wrong idea about how long the average penis is, with the majority of them believing it to be eight to twelve inches long (which is fucking huge and extremely uncommon). There is a medically mandated method for measuring ones penis that urologists use to fit patients for penile implants. The medically-correct method is to place a ruler firmly against the pubic bone on the top side of the erect penis and measure to the tip of the head. Measuring from underneath is not the correct way. The size of a guy’s flaccid penis is not indicative of what size it will be when it gets hard. You can however get a fairly accurate estimation of what a penis’ erect length will be if you stretch the flaccid penis out and measure it. According to Google the size of an average penis is 14.2cm, or 5.6 inches. Most studies on Caucasian males put the average penis at five to seven inches when erect, with a circumference of 4.9 inches. In 1948 Professor Alfred Kinsey published data from 3,500 self-measured men and found 65.7% to be between 5.5 and 6.5 inches in length, with the average just over 6 inches. This was later revised with an additional 300 men who were measured by researchers, and it was found that the average size was more likely to be 5.5 inches. It is extremely uncommon to have a condition called micropenis, that is an erect length of 7cm or less, or just under three inches, and likewise it is extremely unlikely to have a penis that is over eight inches long. What factors correlate to cock size? There is no scientific consensus on other body parts being indicative of cock size, such as the size of a person’s feet, hands or nose. Most studies measure Caucasian penises, so it is hard to work out a truly international average penis size. Of course,one wonders,just these surveys are done ?600 men come in and ship it out,with tape measures.People often quote and require crap on the internet.We wonder,where the real truth lies ? A study by a French military surgeon at the end of the 19th century who wrote under the pseudonym Dr Jacobus X, found Asian guys in what is now modern day Vietnam had smaller penises at 4-4.5 inches on average, which were in proportion to their smaller build, and he also found that Arabs and Africans had on average the largest penises. He described Arab penises at an average size of 7.2 to 7.6 inches as being big enough to “produce mischief in the rectum of any poor wretch who consented to suffer its terrible attacks”. From his writing I think he was probably a bit dick crazy, which I can definitely understand after hours of researching penises for this blog post. Research cited in Penis Size and Enlargement by Gary Griffin notes that white guys and black guys have penises that are comparable in average erect length. Black penises are larger on average than white guys’, however only by ¼ of an inch, or half a centimetre. He explains that the difference lies predominantly in the flaccid state. Black penises, when soft, are larger on average than Caucasian penises that are soft; so the next time you go to profile a black guy as having a big dick please stop and realise that your assumptions aren’t actually adhering to fact. A survey of more than 1,000 men in India has concluded that condoms made according to international sizes are too large for a majority of Indian men. This has led to the distribution of smaller sized condoms in India, as is already the case in Japan. American Soldiers drop extra large condoms out of planes over the island of Japan,with the words size small.on the side.Five hundred naps cut their own throats afterwards.Some where students are University of Pennsylvania at the time.They were texting at the time and walked into open manhole covers at the time.Others jump out student Windows. White Student Gary Carr was using his big dick to be bungee jumping about a near by window.And Asian student Wing Dong Small saw it and filmed it,at the time.He showed the video to his friends and they all jumped out Windows one by one. One white student at Drexel university,fell out a window playing Nerf Football.He had a really big dick. Do gay men have bigger dicks? Data from the Kinsey Report was analysed in 1999 in a report co-authored by Dr. Anthony Bogaert of Brock University in Ontario, Canada and Dr. Scott Hershberger of California State University-Long Beach. They found that gay men are likely to have an average dick size of 6.32 inches when erect, compared to 5.99 inches in straight men. Likewise gay men are likely to have a penis that is 0.15 inches larger in circumference. We have all heard the saying that Black men are packing in the private area but is this really legend or just another urban myth? As a woman, you can’t even begin to decipher that question unless you have experience in between the sheets with a variety of men from different ethnic backgrounds. The majority of us feed into the stereotype that our brothers are the biggest but we might be getting hood-winked. Do we know for sure that another man isn’t just as endowed? I’ve had several “Is that it?!’ encounters on both sides of the fence so I won’t say all Black males are packing but there was one brother I met that should definitely be in the Guinness Book of World Records. I’ll call him *Willy. Although Willy and I only dated for a short time and never got it on, the size of his member is worth talking about. *His real name is Frank Purvis,the biggest liar on Earth. We were messing around one day and I saw it. I couldn’t believe my eyes. It was what my girls and I would call “anaconda” huge. There was no way I was getting close to that! I would rather give birth without an epidural then have sex with that! It had pain, not pleasure written all over it. *1 *1.According to Robert Traillings,the biggest liar on Earth. To date, there are only two well-respected studies commonly referred to in regard to size and in my opinion outdated. William H. Masters and Virginia E. Johnson’s 1966 study and a 1996 study by Dr. Wessels both conclude that there is no significant size difference found among races. Source. According to a popular report on this very subject, Kinsey data states that there is a slight difference between the Black and White male member size. The data suggests that on average, a White male has a member measuring 6.2 inches long and 3.7 inches around versus the average Black male whose member is approximately 6.3 by 3.8 inches. If your keeping track, that’s only a 0.1 inch difference. However, Black males knocked it out the park when it came to regular or “flaccid” length at 4.3 inches versus 4.0 inches for White males. So it does appear that Black males appear larger at least at first. But then,mutant males of the planet Thera from 6 to 60,claim a flassid penis 13 inches long and hard penis 35 inches long.Kryptonian males all claim a flassid penis 9 inches and 13 inch hard.Thanagarian claim to all have an average 25 inch penis.Smurfs claim to have big ones under those diapers or so they say. How big is the above average dick? Perhaps around seven to eight inches. above average dick don't get much press. Perhaps around nine to the inches.Extremely above average dicks don't get much press. Regard tabloid crap writers,many having a tiny penis,will write about that. Source.The Energy that gives the well hung man their powers. A pediatric nurse shared her findings on the internet. She said when circumcising Black male babies, they always use the largest Plastibell(an instrument used in circumcising that comes in 6 sizes). “Already from birth, a Black baby has a larger penis. Seven inches.We always end up using one of the larger sized Plastibells. White babies are from medium to large. And Asian babies are from small to medium.” She said.She name was Nurse Ratchet. Source: Yes the Sourse.The energy that binds all things together. Based on that information, you can draw your own conclusions. Maybe we aren’t getting “hood-winked” after all! *Names have been changed to protect identity. Actually,there names are Mike Millions,Dennis Petty,Keith Tolbert,Sir Reginald Marcus Pierce,Donald J.Trump,Jeremy the Stink Bum,Bob the exploding Cat,Oscar the Trash Panda,Fred Ballsinmouth,who survived landing on the sun, Masturbatory morons and mediocre dimwits claim the average size penis is about 10.32 inches for white porn stars and 62 .6 inches for the average black male.Likewise gay men are likely to have a penis that is 47 inches in length sort and 72.15 inches larger in circumference.Jonah Falcon claims to have a 13 Inches soft with a 10 circumference and 26 inches hard with a 25 inches in diameter.The incredible hulk claims to have a 35 inch penis soft and a 60 Inches of hard.He also claims,that he can knock down bank vaults with cum and shoot it into the air like a fountain.Superman -Kal El of Krypton claims to have a 100 inch penis soft and 300 inch penis hard.Mandingo Manhunter claims to have a 99 inch cock soft and a 200 inch dick hard.He claims,that he can beat it upon the ground to create an earthquake to stop his arch nemesis Doctor Donald Trump and his KKK Nazi Destroyers. Casper the Friendly Ghost claims not to a penis,because he is a Harvey Comic character and nobody in that universe has a penis.Well,actually Hot Stuff has a big one under his big baby diaper,but nobody talk about that.Stumble the Giant is hung like a horse,but he is a giant 60 feet tall.Galactus ,Destroyed of Worlds would have a dick,but then that would be the Ultimate Nullifier.Imperex claims not to know what a dick is,but Doomsday says one if exist,it would be way bigger than his.Ron Jeremy and Jonah Falcon would know how big penis is,if not for the fact both have it in there mouths At the time.Imperial Tauron Sentry says he would claim to have big dick,but he only responds words like "Imperial Tauron Sentry Barrada Nicto or Gort Declato Klasco." from Klaatu. At the end of the day it’s not the size of the wave but the motion of the ocean.If course,this only works for Popeye the Sailor or Sinbad the Sailor or Captain Don.Winslow of the Navy. Studies by Masters and Johnson found that men with erections of less than two inches were still able to satisfy their partners. Then again,they could be utter liars.If you really want something to measure, measure pleasure.I'll measure my massive 13 inch cock. Maybe George Michael s sound like He is signing "Last Christmas,I have you my heart",he just got annually raped in Woody 's bathroom. Monster Sized Condoms from Big Dick Monster Sized Condoms is available,by throwing a rock with money through a window at Fifth and Japip Street,on a any third corner of any city.Big Dick Monster Sized Condoms will throw the rock back,providing we don't hit you or a car with it. Condoms are available for free from endinghiv.org.nz in our standard sized packs, or you can send us a message to get some free XL or narrow fit condoms sent out to you. Just message us at hello@endinghiv.org. Doctor Donald Blake. Doctor Victor Von Doom. Doctor Stephan Strange Doctor Leonard H.McCoy. Doctor Reed Richards. This story originally appeared in the July 2018 issue with the title "Junior! The Real Story of Donald Trump Jr." Doctor Stephen Strange Doctor Victor Von Doom Doctor Reed Richards Doctor Who Doctor McCoy Doctor Chruster Doctor Fate Doctor Smith FOLLOW US ON Instagram Follow @GQ for photos of celebrities, what to wear to work, and more.As if we give shits what celebrities, what to wear to work, and more. Follow Us on Brogger. Follow Us On Facebook-just say anything not PC. Follow Us On Twitter-the Donald Trump Fake News feed. Follow Us On Pinterest-which nobody can download anything. Follow Us On YouTube-unless they take the content down for more videos of My Little Puny Follow Us On Tumblr-lots of porn there. Follow Us On Instagram-if you can get the fucking thing to work,that is. Subscription Services Careers Condé Nast Store Reprints / Permissions GQ Media Kit Site Map Masthead Accessibility Help Condé Nast CNMN Collection © 2018 Condé Nast. All rights reserved. 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